Tuesday, October 31, 2006

If it makes you want to pee, is it art?


Here's a wee story from the onions-protruding-from-the-anus school of fine arts.


Picture this: You’re a first-year student in the Drama Department at the Iceland Academy for the Arts. You’re in a class entitled ‘Education and Praxis’ and your group of three guys and one girl has one hour to come up with a scenario depicting ‘ugliness in contemporary culture’. Your task is to ‘gaze into society in order to define its manifestation’.

So away you go to make up a mini-play. When you come back you, the girl, are naked. The three guys are wearing doctors’ coats. First they cut off your hair, then they cut off your pubic hair. Finally, one of them pisses all over you.

FIN.

Yes, dear reader: this little mini-drama took place at the Drama Department at the Iceland Academy for the Arts yesterday and was reported by the Icelandic National Broadcasting Service under the heading: ‘An Unusual Project at the Iceland Academy of the Arts’. Ah, the beauty of understatement!

Meanwhile, the Academy sent forth a press release today in which it states, and-I-quote, “The Drama Department at the Iceland Academy for the Arts considers it important in higher education for students to tackle all the possible forms and manifestations of art. They must have artistic flexibility to explore their own limits within the protected environs of the school.”

In other words, they’re not getting spanked.

AND ‘HERO OF THE WEEK’ GOES TO…
Here’s a story that ends well. The weekend before last, a Norwegian woman walking down Laugavegur accepted a ride from a foreign man in a white car who stopped his car and offered “drive home?” in broken English. The man’s “drive home” consisted of driving the woman to the outskirts of the city and raping her. This was reported on the evening news last week.

Meanwhile, an Icelandic woman had also been approached by a guy in a white car on Laugavegur, who offered “drive home?” in broken English. She declined, but clearly being a super-sleuth she craftily jotted down the guy’s licence plate number as he drove away. Then, when she saw the report, all she had to do was to call the police with the guy’s licence and off they went and arrested him. Bingo!

SO AS YT GAZES INTO THE SKY TO DEFINE ITS MANIFESTATION…
She can report that it was a lovely, if a tad cool, day today. Frosty this morning, -5° C to be precise. Lots of people shuffling along all bundled up with little breath clouds emerging from their mouths. Beautiful sunrise – the sky all pink and powder blue. It warmed up as the day went on and right now it’s –1°C. Weatherman promises this is but a short cold spell. Sunrise today was at 09.07 and sunset 17.15.

PS. Happy Halloween! to all my North American friends. And remember: the apples go directly in the bin.