Thursday, March 27, 2008

In which the YT cranium ejects random incoherent thoughts commonly associated with newspaper horoscopes

1. I have a new obsession: the saltwater hot pot at the Laugardalslaug swimming pool. It's the poor man's Blue Lagoon - cures what ails ya without the resultant bankruptcy. Seriously, there's just something about that water and salt combo that MELTS away tension and anxiety and leaves your skin feeling silky smooth ALL OVER. [Say, why did I never get into doing voice overs for North American televison commercials??] It smells kinda funky, though, sort of like the person next to you has been drinking double scotches since breakfast, double scotches mixed with chlorine, in fact, and the first time I was in there had me eyeing an old guy with intense suspicion and considerable derision for the duration of my soak. Now other people eye me with derision, but nevermind. I forgive them for they know not what they do.

2. So there I was today, soaking in the Jacuzzi at the Laugardalslaug swimming pool [before I got to the saltypot], and these four Americans get in and I'm all like, I bet they didn't get naked in the shower. So later when I'm in the changerooms one of the American ladies comes in and she's in the shower and sort of glancing around and sees that everyone is naked but her, and I'm shampooing my hair and thinking to myself, I bet she won't do it, I bet she won't get naked. And then she turns around in the shower and ... she does it! She gets naked!! And I literally have to stop myself from going over there and tapping her on the shoulder and then giving her a big fat naked hug. You know? Because she's a trouper.

3. AAH has just got her learner's permit and I'm teaching her how to drive. And so we get back today from our drive and I look in the mirror and I see that, like, half of the hairs on my head have turned grey. And five of my fingernails are missing. Later I find them embedded in the dashboard of my car.

4. Yeah, so before I went out teaching AAH how to drive I was in the saltypot at the Laugardalslaug swimming pool. And before I was there, I was having a massage. And before I was there, I was at a funeral. It's been a bizarre day.

5. Iceland is not going bankrupt! Iceland is not a big toxic hedge fund! You're all just a bunch of bullies! Only Richard Portes is our friend.

I BET YOU HADN'T NOTICED THAT
MY BRAIN'S ALL FRIED
Like it always is when I've been to a funeral then had a massage and then a long soak in a hot pot, particularly one with salt in it, and when the Icelandic economy is crashing down all around me and AAH is driving through the rubble. At this moment my bed wafts in my mind's eye like an oasis in the desert. It's still cold here, today there was wind, and later on when I was out having my hair turned grey I saw a snowstorm hovering over Mt. Esja, very dramatic looking, and apparently it's due to pass over our fair city tonight. Right now it's 2°C [36F], and the day is getting longer and longer all the time. It's light way before 7 am these days, with sunrise proper at precisely 7.02 this morning, sunset at 8.05.

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